#Miller6Pack

Gia P had an emotional breakdown tonight. Like the kind we haven't seen for months. Like the kind where she cried inconsolably. But, there was one difference. This time, she could tell me why she was crying. It had been a lazy day. It was supposed to have been the first day back to school after a much needed and enjoyed 2-week Christmas break. Somewhat unexpectedly, we got the news this morning that today was a snow day. Gia was the only one disappointed. I suspect that may have had something to do with her breakdown later on. But only just a little. Before dinner, she was looking through the Journey to Gia blog book that we made a couple of months ago. She loves going through it, looking at the pictures, and telling us things about "my China." So, I didn't think anything of it when she pointed to the picture in the book. The one I used to worry about her seeing. The one she's looked at many times since without much of an emotional reaction. Shu Me...

I'm writing this from the waiting room of the Providence Sacred Heart Medical Center & Children's Hospital, while we wait for Gia Pearl to be done with her MRI. Gia is one of the bravest people I have ever known, but no matter how child focused a hospital is, they are still stressful, scary places to be, especially for a little one that is undergoing many life changes and transitions. Gia the Brave. I recently wrote about perspective after we went out to dinner and met one of the most friendly and helpful food service workers we have seen in a long time. I'm getting another dose of perspective today. Let me tell you something, nothing will give you a sense of how ephemeral and fleeting life can be, like visiting a hospital with your child. Here you are surrounded by some of the brightest, most compassionate, skilled medical professionals around, but you also see the abundance of people with medical needs. Some are more severe than others, but all are needs. All are ...

We have had quite a 3+ month span in the Miller house since returning from China with Gia Pearl. We've worked as hard as we can to establish and nurture a Godly and healthy attachment with our new little girl. Like any family, this has come with ups, downs, challenges, successes, laughter, and tears. But we have been beyond blessed during each and every step of this journey. Things have happened in our family that have caused us to be even more grateful for one another, and to also not take for granted the loved ones in our immediate and extended family. Despite all the reminders that God gives us of all the things we can be thankful for, and despite all the opportunities that we enjoy, we don't always show that gratitude in our daily actions. We take one another for granted, lose patience with one another, and don't show love when we don't feel like it. We complain about our jobs, traffic, construction, mattresses that make us uncomfortable , coffee that isn't...

On this, our 3-month anniversary with Gia, let's talk attachment. In the adoption arena, sometimes attachment becomes the "A" word. Some adoptive parents kind of don't want to talk about attachment so as not to "jinx" the process. You see, attachment is the BIG unknown in adoption. Yes, there might be undiagnosed or unknown medical or special needs; yes, there may be unknown issues regarding birth parents or orphanage care. But, by far, the question "will this child attach to us?" (or its inverse: will I attach with this child?) is the single most important issue in adoption. Sometimes, attachment is EASY. And praise the Lord for those times. Other times, not so much. It can take weeks, months, even years for attachments to form between adopted child and adoptive parents. So...we've been home, Gia and I, all.summer.long. Cocooning. Bonding. ATTACHING. In fact, at times, I've felt like I was going stir crazy, needing to get out of ...

I started this blog in China during our #journeytogia. I'm going to modify it here and there and finish it because I keep putting it off. There is so much going through my head the last few weeks, settling on something to write about has been a challenge. We have been getting all kinds of inquiries about our family since returning home, ranging from things like "how is her English," to "how is it going?" At some point I think we will blog specifically to the most frequently asked questions, but I thought I'd address a particular question that Amy and I get asked regularly, because I think this question sets the stage for a reflective post such as this. Aside from "Why adoption?" which is perhaps an entire separate post, or series of posts, which you could also glean from reading our previous blog posts and piecing things together. "Why China?" is probably the question we get asked most frequently by family, friends, and loved ones. I...

It's been 49 days since we met Gia for the very first time. 49 days. Much has happened in those 49 days. Things are going quite well, as far as international adoptions go. The "good" days far outweigh the "bad" days. But there are bad days. I've shared about them on this blog. On Facebook. With family and friends. We have an amazing support group of family, friends, and adoption communities. AMAZING. But sometimes, when I share about the hard parts of adoption--Gia's adoption--I can hear the unspoken "but...." "But, didn't you kind of sign up for this when you chose to adopt?" Yes. And no. YES, we signed up for this. This finding our new normal. This learning how to parent 3 girls instead of 2. This sibling "jockeying" for position and learning their new roles in our family. This figuring out how to buckle 3 car seats into the middle row. This having to use a car roof rack, even on short trips. Thi...

GRAFTING: verb   (used   with   object) 1. to   insert   (a   graft)   into   a   tree   or   other   plant;   insert   a   scion   of   (one   plant)   into  another   plant. 2. to   cause   (a   plant)   to   reproduce   through   grafting . 3. Surgery.   to   transplant   (a   portion   of   living   tissue,   as   of   skin   or   bone)   as   a  graft. 4. to   attach   as   if   by   grafting Gia has been a Miller for 1 month. During that time, a lot of grafting has been going on. In the adoption world, you hear a lot about "grafting." I think several of the definitions above fit with the process we are experiencing right now. I'm sure that poor Gia has felt as though her heart has been literally cut out of her body, ...