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Showing posts from October, 2018

Malleability

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The other day, we had a marathon session at Shriner’s with our youngest. She went through a pretty hellish surgery/recovery a little over a year ago, from which she still suffers PTSD. (She gets freaked out thinking that the doctors had to cut her to fix her hips.) Anyway, at one point during our session, she saw her x-rays with a large screw in one hip. For some reason, that screw caused her to get really quiet and sad. She was even brushing tears off her cheeks at one point. When I pulled her close to me and asked what she was feeling, she said “mommy, I don’t remember any China words.” From there, she went to several other statements about her life in China...her “old” mom, dad, and brother, to…"I miss my China friends.” You see, in the adoption community, and often from outside it, we hear or are told that our kids are resilient. That they can bounce back from the trauma they’ve faced, and that the lives they have now can somehow erase or make up for their traum